Learn your lessons, or you will keep repeating the same mistakes.

Learn your lessons, or you will keep repeating the same mistakes.

I remember being at a low point in my life, and asking God, “Why do I have to keep going through this over and over again? Why do I keep attracting these types of men? Is there something within me that causes these types of men to cling to me? Why does this keep happening over and over again?”

The answer – I failed my test. I didn’t learn my lesson. I kept doing the same thing and expecting a different outcome.

In essence, my purpose and passion revolves around love and relationships. So, most of my greatest struggles in life have come from love and relationships. That pain led to my purpose.

What I was supposed to do was learn from my mistakes and grow from them. I was supposed to take all that I learned and share that with someone else. If I was presented with that test again I was supposed to do the opposite of what I did the first time. <- that is where I failed. I learned my mistakes. I shared them with those going through similar experiences, but when it was time for me to really prove that I had changed, I would do the exact same thing I did before.

I created a cycle. A cycle of failure. A cycle of loving a losing. I had to realize that what I was losing wasn’t really a loss. It was an opportunity for me to strengthen my character.

So I asked God, “What do I need to do? I want more of you. I want a genuine relationship with you. I want a healthy and lasting relationship with a man that is meant for me. One filled with communication, honesty, consistency and unconditional love. What do I need to do?”

Then… I received this “random” text message…

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The next day, one of the guys that I used to be in a toxic relationship with messaged me on Facebook and I realized that conversation was about to lead to this cycle starting up all over again. It was about to lead to another six months to a year being wasted. Love being wasted. Energy and time being wasted. Intimacy being wasted. Unnecessary pain and disappointment that comes from being with someone you have absolutely no intentions of marrying just because you’re bored or tired of being single.

I chose for the first time to end that cycle before it even began. I chose to learn from my mistakes, share them with the world, and not repeat the same actions over and over again. I chose for the first time to pass this relational test.

I’d rather be single, happy and at peace than in a relationship filled with uncertainty and unhappiness all for the sake of being able to change my relationship status.

Sometimes, we keep ourselves in situations we want to get out of out of comfort. Out of fear. Out of ignorance.

Here’s what I learned – your thoughts determine how you feel and what you believe about something. How you feel about something determines your actions. Your actions determine whether or not you will have the same or a different outcome.

If you’re stuck in a cycle that’s leaving you empty or filled with unhappiness and a lack of peace check your thoughts. What are you feeding your mind? How do you really feel about the situation? Do you really believe what you’re going through is unhealthy or are you satisfied with the place you’re in?

Change your thoughts. Watch that change how you feel and what you believe. Let what you believe change your actions, and when your actions change… what how your life transforms!

Lesson learned! Are you going to learn from my mistakes? Or will you ignore this warning and continue to make your own?

Peace, love and blessings!

B. Love

And so it begins…

And so it begins…

A year ago I was talking to this guy and we were vibing and talking about our dreams. I told him that I wanted my own publishing company; but I didn’t want just a publishing company. No, I wanted to publish books, poetry, music, and I wanted to produce films, and plays. He was so supportive and down. He told me that he believed in me and wanted to stick around to watch me achieve my dreams.

Almost exactly a year later I am living my dream. I have my own publishing company – B. Love Publications and I’m one step closer to conquering everything that I said I wanted to do.

What’s so crazy is… in the midst of this most perfect time in my life, there’s a bittersweet pull at my heart because he is no longer in my life to share this with me. When I published my first book with Ambiance Books I wanted desperately to call him and tell him, but I couldn’t.

When Kailani and Bishop was in the top 100 charts for over a month on Amazon I wanted to call him, but I couldn’t.

When I decided to step out on faith and start my own publishing company just as we talked about I wanted to call him, but I couldn’t.

And then I realized, his purpose in my life was to get me to this point – not to share it with me.

Had I not met him I wouldn’t have taken the necessary steps to get to this point. Had I not lost him and been so consumed by my feelings I wouldn’t have written Kailani and Bishop and sought to get it published. I wouldn’t be writing this post today.

So, I said all of this to share with you my 5 P’s of my personal success. Your Purpose is often found in your Pain, but with the right Perspective it can Push you into your Passion and destiny.

Don’t let anything hinder you or keep you from releasing the story and the greatness within you!!

I’m a dream chaser, and the fact that my dreams are becoming a reality makes me even more motivated to help others chase their dreams and fulfill them!

What burning desire is raging inside of you? What pain did you overcome that almost consumed you? Find the purpose in your pain. Keep the right perspective. Let that push you into your passion and destiny!!

Peace, love and blessings –

B. Love